You know what’s wild? We spend so much time talking about how women need words of affirmation, but somehow, society has forgotten that men have ears, too. And feelings. Shocking, I know.
After years of working with couples in my practice, I’ve watched relationships transform when women start verbalizing what they feel.
I’ve seen tough guys tear up when their girlfriend finally says something they’ve been dying to hear.
And I’ve watched connections deepen simply because someone took three seconds to say the right thing at the right time.
Men aren’t mind readers. They need to hear certain things just as much as you do.
And if you think your guy doesn’t care about sweet words? You’re wrong. He’s just been conditioned to pretend he doesn’t.
Let’s change that today.
What Do Guys Like To Hear?
Strip away all the complicated relationship advice, and it comes down to this: men want to feel valued, desired, and needed. Just like you do.
They want to hear that they matter. That they’re doing a good job. That you notice their efforts and appreciate who they are.
It’s not rocket science, but somehow, we’ve made it complicated.
In my years studying attachment theory and working with couples, I’ve identified some patterns.
Men who regularly hear affirming words from their partners show higher relationship satisfaction, better emotional regulation, and stronger commitment levels.
The research backs this up, but honestly, you don’t need a Ph.D. to understand that people respond well to genuine appreciation.
The key difference? Men often express their need for affirmation differently from women. They might not ask for it directly. They might shrug it off when you give it. But trust me, they’re absorbing every word.
18 Things Guys Like To Hear From Their Girlfriends
1. I Love You
This one seems obvious, right? But you’d be shocked how many women assume their boyfriend knows they love him, so they stop saying it.
Saying “I love you” never gets old. Every time you say it, you’re reinforcing the emotional bond between you.
You’re reminding him that, despite his flaws, his bad days, and that annoying thing he does with his socks, you choose him.
I’ve counseled couples who were struggling, and one of the first things I ask is “when’s the last time you told each other ‘I love you’?” The answers are usually depressing. Life gets busy.
You get comfortable. And suddenly weeks go by without those three essential words.
Make it a habit. Say it when he leaves for work. Text it randomly during the day.
Whisper it before you fall asleep. It costs nothing and means everything.
2. You Are Sexy
Men have body image issues, too. They worry about their dad bod. They notice when they’re losing hair. They wonder if you still find them attractive or if you’re just going through the motions.
When you tell him he’s sexy, you’re doing more than complimenting his appearance. You’re telling him you desire him.
That he still turns you on. That after all this time, he’s still got it.
One client told me her husband transformed when she started being more vocal about finding him attractive. He started working out again.
\Not because she demanded it, but because he felt desirable for the first time in years. That’s the power of your words.
Be specific when you can: “You look incredibly sexy in that shirt” hits differently than a generic compliment. It shows you’re paying attention.
3. You Are The Best
Nobody wants to feel replaceable. In a world full of options and dating apps and “the grass is greener” mentality, your guy needs to know he’s your first choice.
Telling him he’s the best isn’t about lying or inflating his ego unnecessarily. It’s about making him understand that to you, he’s irreplaceable.
He’s not competing with your exes, with celebrities, or with that guy at your gym. He’s already won.
This phrase addresses a primal insecurity most men carry: Am I enough? When you confidently tell him he’s the best, you’re answering that question.
And that security allows him to show up more fully in the relationship.
4. I Miss You
Whether you’ve been apart for two hours or two days, telling him you miss him triggers something powerful. It communicates that his presence matters. That your life feels different when he’s not in it.
Missing someone is active, not passive. It means you’re thinking about them. That they occupy mental and emotional space even when they’re not physically there. And men need to know this.
I’ve worked with couples in long-distance relationships, and the ones who thrive are the ones who regularly express missing each other.
It maintains the emotional connection across the physical distance.
Pro tip: Get specific about what you miss. “I miss your laugh” or “I miss how you make coffee in the morning” is more impactful than just “I miss you.”
It shows you’re thinking about the little things that make him unique.
Sweet Nothings Guys Like To Hear
5. I Need You
This one makes some women uncomfortable. We’ve been taught that needing someone makes us weak or dependent.
But here’s what I’ve learned working with hundreds of couples: healthy interdependence is the foundation of strong relationships.
When you tell him you need him, you’re not saying you’re helpless. You’re saying you value his presence in your life.
That he adds something irreplaceable. That you choose to share your burdens with him.
Men are wired to provide and protect. It’s not about toxic masculinity; it’s about basic psychology.
When you express genuine need, you’re allowing him to fulfill a role that makes him feel valued and masculine in a healthy way.
There’s a difference between “I need you to fix this for me” and “I’m struggling with this and I could really use your support.”
The latter respects his autonomy while still expressing need.
6. I Trust You Completely
Trust is currency in relationships. When you tell him you trust him, you’re handing him something precious and saying,” I believe you’ll protect this.”
This phrase hits different for men because society constantly questions their integrity.
We’re bombarded with messages about men being cheaters, liars, or emotionally unavailable.
When you look him in the eye and say you trust him completely, you’re pushing back against all that noise.
I’ve watched men rise to meet the trust their partners place in them. It creates accountability in the best way possible.
He won’t want to disappoint you because you’ve shown faith in his character.
Important caveat: Only say this if you mean it. Trust that’s given as manipulation or when it’s not genuinely felt creates confusion and resentment.
Be honest about where you’re at, and work toward building real trust if it’s not there yet.
7. I Got Something Special For You
Everyone loves surprises, but men especially appreciate them because they’re so rarely on the receiving end.
Women get flowers, jewelry, and surprise dates. What do men get? Maybe a birthday gift if they’re lucky.
The phrase itself builds anticipation. It shows you were thinking about him when he wasn’t around.
That you saw something and thought, “he would love this.” That’s intimacy.
The gift doesn’t have to be expensive. It could be his favorite snack, a book he mentioned wanting, or tickets to something he’s into.
The value is in the thoughtfulness, not the price tag.
The men who feel most appreciated in relationships are the ones whose partners notice and act on the small things they mention. It’s about feeling seen and heard.
8. You Are The Most Handsome Man In My World
Notice the qualifier: “in my world.” This phrase acknowledges reality (yes, objectively handsome men exist) while making it clear that to you, he’s the gold standard.
Physical attraction matters. And men need to know you’re still physically attracted to them.
Not just emotionally or intellectually, but that you look at him and think “damn, that’s my man.”
This becomes increasingly important in long-term relationships when the initial infatuation fades.
You’ve seen him sick, stressed, and at his worst. But you still find him attractive. That’s powerful.
Things Guys Like To Hear From A Woman
9. I Want You
Sexual desire shouldn’t be one-sided. When you express wanting him, you’re evening the playing field and making him feel desirable.
“I want you” can mean different things in different contexts. It could be sexual. It could be emotional. It could be “I want you in my life.” All variations matter.
I’ve noticed that men in relationships where their partner actively expresses desire (both sexual and emotional) report higher satisfaction and feel more secure.
It counteracts the fear that they’re the only ones invested.
Don’t wait for him to always initiate. Whether it’s physical intimacy or quality time, expressing what you want makes him feel desired rather than just convenient.
10. I Love The Way You Took Me Last Night
Let’s talk about sexual validation because apparently nobody else will. If the sex was great, tell him. If he did something that drove you wild, tell him that, too.
Men aren’t automatic sex machines. They worry about performance. They wonder if you enjoyed yourself or if you’re faking it.
When you give genuine feedback about what worked, you’re helping him understand your body while making him feel like a sexual god. Everybody wins.
One couple I worked with was struggling sexually until the woman started being more vocal about what she enjoyed.
Suddenly, their intimacy improved dramatically because he finally had a roadmap. Communication is everything.
You don’t have to be crude: Even something like “last night was incredible” or “I’m still thinking about what you did” gets the message across.
11. What Are You Thinking About
This simple question opens doors. It shows curiosity about his inner world. It communicates that his thoughts matter to you.
Men often feel like they have to figure everything out alone. When you ask what’s on his mind, you’re offering a safe space for him to process out loud.
Even if he doesn’t take you up on it immediately, he’ll remember you asked.
I teach active listening skills to couples, and this phrase is where it starts. You can’t understand someone if you never ask what’s happening in their head.
Follow-up matters: If he shares something, actually engage with it. Don’t ask and then scroll your phone while he talks. That’s worse than not asking at all.
12. I Believe You Can Do It
Your belief in him can literally change his trajectory. When someone you love expresses confidence in your abilities, it rewires how you see yourself.
I’ve watched men take career risks, start businesses, and chase dreams specifically because their partner said, “I believe in you.” That external validation becomes internal motivation.
This is especially important during failure or uncertainty. When he’s doubting himself, your unwavering belief can be the anchor that keeps him going.
FYI, this is backed by research on self-efficacy and social support.
Make it specific: Instead of just “you can do it,” try “you’re brilliant at problem-solving, and I know you’ll figure this out.” Specific praise feels more genuine and meaningful.
Nice Things Guys Like To Hear
13. I was wrong., Please Forgive Me
Apologizing is a superpower that too few people possess. When you can admit you were wrong and ask for forgiveness, you’re showing emotional maturity and respect for his feelings.
Men aren’t taught to expect apologies from women. Society has this weird thing where women are always right in relationships (thanks, sitcoms). So when you genuinely apologize, it stands out.
A real apology includes three things: acknowledging what you did, taking responsibility, and asking for forgiveness. “I’m sorry you feel that way” is not an apology.
“I was wrong to speak to you that way. I take full responsibility, and I’m asking you to forgive me” is an apology.
This creates safety: When both partners can admit fault and apologize genuinely, it creates a relationship where mistakes don’t end in divorce court. They end in repair and growth.
14. I Love Your Thought Pattern
Intelligence isn’t just about IQ scores. It’s about how someone thinks, how they approach problems, how they view the world.
When you compliment his mind, you’re appreciating something fundamental about who he is.
Men often feel like they’re valued for what they do or what they provide, not for who they are. Complimenting his thought process says, “I value how your brain works.
You make me think differently.”
This is especially powerful for men who don’t fit traditional masculine stereotypes. The sensitive, thoughtful, creative men who sometimes feel like they’re not “man enough” need to hear that their way of thinking is valued.
15. Have Fun With Your Friends
Permit him to have a life outside the relationship. Yes, I said permission, and before you roll your eyes, hear me out.
Many men feel guilty about spending time with friends because they’ve been in relationships where their partner made them feel bad about it.
When you actively encourage him to maintain those friendships, you’re showing confidence in your relationship.
Healthy relationships require space. You’re not joined at the hip. When he comes back from time with his friends, he’ll appreciate you more because you gave him freedom without guilt.
This prevents resentment: Men who feel controlled or smothered eventually rebel or shut down emotionally. Give him space, and he’ll choose to come back to you.
16. Let Me Handle This Bill
Financial stress kills relationships. When you offer to take on a financial burden, you’re showing partnership and easing his stress.
Men still feel societal pressure to be providers. Even in 2025, even with all our progress, that pressure exists. When you step up and say, “I’ve got this one,” you’re communicating that you’re a team.
I’ve worked with couples where financial resentment built because one partner felt like they carried all the weight.
Sharing the load (both offering and allowing your partner to offer) creates balance.
It’s not about the amount: Whether it’s dinner, rent, or a vacation, the gesture of offering matters more than the dollar value.
Things Men Like To Hear From Women
17. You Have My Support
Support isn’t just about being there during success. It’s about being there during the messy, uncertain, scary parts of life.
When you tell him he has your support, you’re saying “I’m in your corner. Whatever happens, we’ll face it together.” That kind of security allows people to take risks and grow.
I’ve seen men stay in soul-crushing jobs because they felt like they couldn’t risk a career change without their partner’s support. And I’ve seen men thrive when they had that support. The difference is staggering.
Support looks different for everyone: For some, it’s emotional encouragement. For others, it’s practical help. Ask what support looks like to him, and then deliver that.
18. How Can I Help Out
This question is about teamwork. It shows you see his struggles and want to share the load. It communicates partnership in the truest sense.
Men often feel like they have to handle everything alone. When you offer help, you’re breaking down that isolation.
You’re reminding him that relationships are about mutual support, not solo missions.
The beauty of this question is that it lets him define what help looks like. Maybe he needs you to take something off his plate.
Maybe he just needs you to listen. Maybe he needs space to figure it out alone. By asking, you’re respecting his autonomy while offering support.
Things Guys Want To Hear Over Text
Text communication is its own language in modern relationships. If you’re not comfortable saying certain things face-to-face yet, texting is a great way to start expressing appreciation and desire.
1. I Missed You
A simple “I missed you” text during his workday can completely shift his mood. It’s a reminder that someone’s thinking about him even when life is stressful or boring.
The power of this text is in its spontaneity. It’s not scheduled. It’s not a response to something he did. It’s just you, thinking about him, and taking five seconds to tell him.
Mix it up: Sometimes be specific: “I missed your smile today” or “I missed having you next to me this morning.” Specificity makes it feel more genuine and less automated.
2. You Are The Best
This text works as a random reminder that he’s your first choice. Send it for no reason. Not on his birthday. Not after he does something special. Just because.
Random affirmation texts are powerful because they’re unexpected. They show that your appreciation isn’t transactional. You’re not thanking him for doing something; you’re appreciating who he is.
3. I Loved Your Game Last Night
Sexual confidence comes from knowing you’re satisfying your partner. This text gives him that confidence boost while keeping sexual energy alive between physical encounters.
You don’t have to be explicit (though you can be if that’s your style). Even playful innuendo works. “Still thinking about last night” or “You really know what you’re doing ;)” gets the point across.
This keeps anticipation alive: Sexual intimacy shouldn’t only exist during sex. Building anticipation through texts, comments, and touches throughout the day makes the actual intimacy better.
4. Checking Up On You
A simple check-in text shows care without being suffocating. “How’s your day going?” or “Hope that meeting went well” demonstrates that you’re thinking about his life beyond just your relationship.
The key is not to expect an immediate response. You’re not demanding his attention; you’re offering care. If he’s busy, he’ll respond when he can, and he’ll appreciate that you thought of him.
5. Make Sure To Eat Something Good
This maternal-but-not-weird text shows you care about his well-being. It’s nurturing without being controlling.
Men often neglect basic self-care when they’re busy or stressed. A reminder to eat, drink water, or take a break can be exactly what they nee,d but won’t do for themselves. 🙂
Keep it light: You’re not nagging. You’re showing care. There’s a difference in tone, so make sure your texts feel loving, not critical.
Final Note
Look, at the end of the day, relationships thrive on communication. And communication isn’t just about the big talks or resolving conflicts.
It’s about the daily, consistent expressions of appreciation, desire, and respect.
I’m betting you’ll see a difference in how he shows up in your relationship.
